she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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