There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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