There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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