I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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