Well apparently he's into motor boating.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
