So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
