Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
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