can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize