I am in a vortex of obligation.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
