I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
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