Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
