"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
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I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
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we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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