That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
