i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
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