Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
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