Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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