Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
