If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
