you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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