mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
My Higher Power is John Stamos
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
