she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
