started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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