i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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