I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
