how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Randomize
