I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
How's work?
Spinning.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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