I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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