Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
