Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Your dad touched me again.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
