im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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