Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize