Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
