i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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