This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
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My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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