Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Will you blow on my dice?
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
