Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
My ass is underappreciated
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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