Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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