All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
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