Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
