He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize