i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
