She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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