So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
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My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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