I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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