Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
