Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just saw a hot homeless man
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
