a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize