Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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