I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize