how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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