Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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